Friday, 14 February 2014

The Sun: Randy Gay Men Looking For Rumpy Pumpy Sex Boffins Claim

OGLING hardcore filth has more ups than downs, sex boffins claim.

They reckon watching porn improves attitudes towards rumpy pumpy and gives perverts an outlet for their deviant desires.

The erection eggheads also claim that viewing smut does NOT make you a porn addict — with many believing that the condition does not even exist.

Researchers warned that the industry that has grown around treating people with “porn addiction” is cynical and incredibly lucrative. People reporting addiction are likely to be randy gay men who enjoy thrill-seeking, they claim.

One of Fagburn's favourite books from last year was Romps, Tots And Boffins... The Strange Language Of News by Robert Hutton.

As you can see above, "journalese" is incapable of writing a sentence - or even using two words (Erection eggheads?!!) - that anyone would actually say in real life.

As Brian Eno might say, with this in your mind I'd like you to read that again. *

Textbook stuff. 

• Shame-ridden pixelated photo, The Sun's own. 

* Brian never actually said this. But I did, just then. #journalism

1 comment:

  1. Sent this to Robert. He was particularly excited by the neologism "sex boffins".