Wednesday, 4 March 2015

Eric Pickles: Exclusive Interview


Alright, pet.

How are you?

Lovely. Pickles by name, pickles by nature!

What by the many moons of Jupiter does that mean?

I'm from the North, me (chuckles).

Well done.

By 'eck, I hate poor people.

Erm, okay, What are you doing?

Eating a suckling pig sandwich for my lunch.

Are you a secret gay?

Not me, duckie, I'm married.

Has your marriage ever been constipated?

Consummated. I think we should terminate this interview, love...

Hangs up.

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