Yes, this really should be on Channel 5.
Tonight it was The Gays turn, their bodies were judged by 'Dan - who thinks the only thing missing in his life is the love of a good man.'
First Dan saw the four contestants' feet, legs and dicks - though they were flaccid, thus rendering the exercise pointless.
Then bums, chests, and finally their faces.
Dan was very polite, claiming he was making his decisions on body hair, and not that they were practically dickless, fat or fugly.
And boy were they fugly.
A joyless reminder of how sexless this nation is, if nothing else.
Watch on 4OD.