Thursday, 24 January 2013

Gay News: Barf Time Again

A gay man, who was openly gay, has died after drowning in a tidal wave of sentimental vomit, Fagburn can reveal.
Although as yet unconfirmed by doctors, who are openly gay, it is thought this may be another teen suicide related to the sheer pukey awfulness of all those It Gets Better videos posted on YouTube.
Doctors say this exercise in vanity and insincerity may have finally pushed him over the edge.
"We just don't understand this," said his friend, Steve, a gay man who is openly, openly gay.
"He seemed really happy with whatever he was given.
"He always liked watching those YouTube videos they post on gay websites where some posh high school kids do one of those unbelievably fucking annoying flashbomb things to a Lady Gaga song, or ones of some hired killers in Afghanistan lipsynching to Call Me Maybe.
"It's not like he didn't see enough photos of rich gaymarried couples having fun in a park with their trophy baby, either.
"Gay wedding dances, people who film their own coming out and post it online - so brave! - he adored them all.
"And those gay soldier dudes who did bumming - he loved them, too.
"This - quite literally - makes no sense."


  1. I thought you could only vomit rainbows after half a dozen Pousse Cafe...

  2. Maybe he killed himself because he was one of those thousands of young men [and women] who are picked on, harassed, bullied and worse for being gay. Remember you wrote about that to the BBC earlier today.

  3. FFS will you stop with the professional jealousy it's not nearly as entertaining as you think it is!
    Please tell us what you've done that is a tenth as important or newsworthy as his exposing that Christian therapist cunt. I'll wait…

    1. I - literally - have no idea who you're talking about, sir.

  4. You could try using Google. Look up Patrick Strudwick

    - a different Anonymous

  5. Ok, will do...

    Apparently he's a vain and insincere twat with the politics of a wobbly pink blancmange.

  6. A wobbly pink blancmange who nevertheless identified a problem, and instead of just carping from the sidelines or sniping at easy targets on his OWN side (boo hiss, posh boys smell -- that "good posh"smell of Joe Strummer and Ken Loach is fine tho) proactively attacked the problem, consequently gaining a modest bit of leverage in the media and your undying enmity; whereas, you have achieved....

    (Yes, I'll wait, I've got the week off)

  7. Sincere apologies, I didn't know about him doing that expose on an anti-gay Christian therapist.
    If only he'd mentioned it more...