Thursday, 18 December 2014

Cuba: The Last Laugh

God knows how this will work out, maybe they'll just hand Cuba back to the mafia and dig up Batista...

PS If anyone wants to send Fagburn on a two week all-expenses fact-finding trip to 'The New Cuba', just drop me a line.

Wednesday, 17 December 2014

Fagburn's Xmas Listicles 2: 5 Gayest Vegetables

In common with all media outlets Fagburn's basically given up the ghost and gone down the pub til the New Year, and will now fill some space by running pointless listicles.
1. Potato.

2. Carrot.

3. Brussel Sprout.

4. Swede.

5. Garden Pea.

Gay Money: Not In The Pink

Earning differences are a consistent problem for many employees with a minority sexual orientation and present one of the most tangible environmental factors affecting their workplace well-being. Studies for the period 1989–2014 suggest that gay men receive lower earnings than heterosexual men of comparable education, skills, and experience [1], [2]. Any remaining earning gaps between gay and heterosexual men not explained by differences in education level, work experience, and occupation are generally interpreted as evidence of labor market discrimination [1], [2], [3]. Studies find that gay men earn from 4–5% less than heterosexual men in the Netherlands, France, Greece, and the UK to 12–16% less in Canada, Sweden, and the US [1], [2], [3] (Figure 1).

Sexual orientation and labor market outcomes, Nick Drydakis, IZA World of Labor report. *

Although this may surprise many regular readers of the gay media  - the main peddlers of the myth of gay affluence ('Advertise with us, our readers are loaded!' etc) - the real research (all 600 pages worth) was presented several years ago on Joe Clark's excellent blog; Gay Money: The Truth About Lesbian And Gay Economics.

(Actually the main reason this myth persists is  so many gay journalists are literally incapable questioning anything they read on a press release).

The straight media are just as guilty, if not more, of unquestioningly regurgitating junk 'research' and made-up statistics on this. Far too many to list - but Google 'pink pound'.

* The conclusions drawn by Drydakis abiut why gay men earn less are often exercises in spectacular point-missing, and at once both simplistic and convoluted. 

Daily Telegraph: Homophobia Taints The British Newspaper

You couldn't make it up etc etc.

Gays In The News: Jordan James Parks

The Sun.
I'm not sure which one's which, so well done Jordan!

Cliff Richard: 'Creepy', Police Called

Brighton Argus.

Sentimental Gay Twaddle Watch: Don't Kids Say The Funniest Things??

A 9-year-old girl gave this heartfelt letter to her teacher after he came out as gay...

It reads: “Dear Mr R

“Even though you’re gay, I will always treat you the same way as I do now. I still think about you the same way as I used to. You’re a great teacher and these are just some of the word’s (sic) that I would describe you as: great, amazing, fantastic, brilliant, awesome and brave.

“The reason why I say brave is because you shared a personal secret which was very brave.

“You don’t have to feel scared because I know that everone in the class feels the same way as I do.

“From A x x

PS. We are all proud of you”

Adorable! Heart-warming! So brave! Barfs everywhere!

And just the sort of gay story the Mail Online loves!

Sochi: World Now Changed Forever!

The ever hopeless Gay Star News.

Sorry, can't find the bit where we learn what has actually changed gay rights - and the world - FOREVER!!.

Despite such valiant and well-thought out 'actions' as Tilda Swinton taking a selfie while waving a rainbow flag in Red Square, Dame Michael Cashman cutting up his credit card, and some gay venues saying they were boycotting Russian (or non Russian?) vodkas they weren't selling anyway.

Unless you mean it shows how much the gay movement has now become so depoliticised it is only capable of silly self-satisfying stunts that serve power?

Jeremy Thorpe Funeral: Stand By Me

As Mr Thorpe's coffin was carried out of the church some mourners were surprised by a medley of some of his favourite songs played by the Minehead String Quartet; Cher's Bang Bang, Queen's Killer Queen and Getting Away With It by Electronic...

Thought For The Day: Russell Tovey

In the future, I imagine myself looking back and going, "God, I had a nice ass.* Glad I got that out." If it's there now, I'm getting it out because it's not always gonna look like that. I don't want to hide it. And it's nice that people like it. I've been very lucky. I've grown it myself, and I also have my parents to thank for it being well-received.

Chelsea Manning: Happy Birthday!

Dear Chelsea Manning

Birthday wishes from some people who are more famous than the likes of us.

Fagburn: Is Unwell

Not to worry, nothing serious, back soon. x

PS And congrats to Raul Castro and Pope Frankie, and happy birthday to Chelsea Manning (Oh, and The Simpsons)! xx

Monday, 15 December 2014

Fagburn: 5 People You Didn't Know Weren't Gay

In common with all media outlets who've given up the ghost and gone down the pub til Christmas, Fagburn will now only publish pointless listicles.

1. Eric Pickles.

2. William Hague.

3. Sting.

4. Sebastian Coe.

5. Meatloaf.

The Independent: Bit Patronising

Dear The Independent.

My existence is not validated by your silly suggestion a bovine creature might be gay.

So please fuck off.


PS 60,000 cattle are slaughtered in the UK each week. Please stop pretending you care.

Cucumber Banana Tofu: Coming Soon

Can't wait!

Owen Jones: Sold Out

£39, 100 capacity, two hours chat -  you do the math/s!

Conchita Wurst: And How's That Working Out For You?


Sunday, 14 December 2014

Justine: Judy!

Fagburn: Thank You

Fagburn has just had the best possible news ever.

He is too happy clicking his red heels together to post.

Life's too good.

Thank you, Justine. x

Saturday, 13 December 2014

Jeremy Thorpe: Establishment Cover-Up!

And now a quick sneak peek back to how the Mail marked Jeremy Thorpe's laughable acquittal...

Tom Ford: Penis Outrage

Controversial designer Tom Ford has sparked fury by launching a range of penis necklaces - just in time for Christmas.

The phallic pendants - which resemble the shape of a cross - come in gold or silver and are available with small, medium and large charms.

Intended as the perfect holiday gifts for kinky fashionistas, size apparently doesn't matter as they are all priced $790.

But the latest offering from the designer provoked outrage on Twitter from users who said the necklaces were 'unbelievably offensive' to Christians and branded Ford 'sick' for combining a phallic image with a religious symbol.

Susan Swift wrote: 'Just in time for Christmas, a way to say "screw Christ," the savior of the world. This is sick. Just sick.'

Kevlyn Hall added: 'How dare you use a phallic symbol in the Christian cross! You insulting piece of trash! HOW DARE YOU!'

One user said on Twitter: 'This is unbelievably offensive to me. Is he insane?'

Steven Hembree added: 'I think there's a special place in hell for Tom Ford with this necklace. I hope he meets his maker sooner than later.'

And another user said the designer could 'rot in hell', adding: 'What is wrong with people these days?'

Mail Online.

'Outrage on Twitter' is an oxymoron, shirley, one may even say it's a phallacy...

Stonewall: Star Performers

Stonewall today launches a new programme to bring together top-performing organisations who have consistently demonstrated exemplary practice to support lesbian, gay and bisexual staff. The new Stonewall Star Performers – named as Accenture, Barclays, EY, Gentoo, Goldman Sachs, Home Office, IBM and Simmons & Simmons – will lead the development of best practice in Britain and around the world...

Yes, from Goldman Sachs - arguably the biggest unconvicted corporate crooks of all-time - to the Home Office - currently humiliating then deporting gay and lesbian asylum seekers - all these top-performing organisations get the Stonewall thumbs-up.


Or should I say 'Ker-ching!'?

Friday, 12 December 2014

Alan Turing: Was It Murder???

Don't think so, no, but then I'm not convinced it was a suicide, either.

NB 'Mr. Bristow is now attempting to find a publisher for his manuscript 'Boffins, Bombs, Boats and Balloons'.

Roger Scruton: The Strangely Enduring Appeal Of Kitsch

BBC Radio 4 and BBC News magazine.

Thought this was good.

Yup, that's right, I thought something Roger Scruton wrote was good.

He of fox-eating right-wing 'philosopher' fame.

Next thing, I'll be agreeing with an article Julie Bindel wrote!

Pink News: Update

Pink News.
PS Also note date on 'photoshopped' [?] cover, November 2011! Such errors may occur if your idea of news-gathering is typing 'gay' into Yahoo and not checking.

Financial Times: Person Of The Year

So brave etc etc...

PS And thanks for all those Chinese factory worker deaths!

Benjy The Gay Bull: Saved!

‘We would like to say a huge thank you to all 321 supporters who donated what they could afford to help save Benjy and have him transported here to the UK.’ Said Graham Davies, Co-Founder TheGayUK. 

The campaign has brought animal lovers and the gay community together for this fight with a total of £9,401 being raised in just four weeks. This included donations from, Simpsons Co-Creator Sam Simon to an unemployed man who donated his last £5 to help, because he was so upset by the story.

‘A recent survey showed 44% of young LGBT people had considered suicide
[Errant nonsense, but do go on...], which is just sickening. No one, man or beast, should feel unwanted, ashamed, threatened or bullied because of their sexuality.‘ said Graham.

A number of homophobic comments had been left on the official YouTube campaign video, highlighting the problems of cyber bullying, with one saying;

‘There are wars going on in the world and you filthy cream puff queers are going on about saving a faggot bull, how about this? Cull the damn bull and lynch you dirty fags. PROBLEM SOLVED’ - HH500.

Press release - thanks to DS. x

As Britain's 75th most influential gay vegan * can I just repeat this shows why the gay movement is now - officially - fucked.

* Yes, I sometimes eats cheese when I'm drunk, so don't write in.

Grindr: Awards

'Oh no, I really care about what some queens on Grindr think!'
Those awards in full...

Putin = bad!

Hillary Clinton = good!

Every gay man's favourite glamorous unconvicted war criminal - yay!

The Iraq body count is at least 170,000 - how many died on her watch?

Let's not start on Afghanistan.

And do you think she didn't know about CIA torture when she was Secretary of State?

But as mass-murdering 'gay icons' go, she da best!

Well done the gays of Grindr!

Thursday, 11 December 2014

Question Time: That's Entertainment

They were standing under a tree, each with an arm round the other's neck, and Alice knew which was which in a moment, because one of them had "DUM" embroidered on his collar, and the other "DEE". 'I suppose they've each got "TWEEDLE" round at the back of the collar,' she said to herself.

They stood so still that she quite forgot they were alive, and she was just going round to see if the word "TWEEDLE" was written at the back of each collar, when she was startled by a voice coming from the one marked "DUM".

'If you think we're wax-works,' he said, 'you ought to pay, you know. Wax-works weren't made to be looked at for nothing. Nohow.'

'Contrariwise,' added the one marked "DEE", 'if you think we're alive, you ought to speak.'

'I'm sure I'm very sorry,' was all Alice could say; for the words of the old song kept ringing through her head like the ticking of a clock, and she could hardly help saying them out loud:

Tweedledum and Tweedledee
Agreed to have a battle!
For Tweedledum said Tweedledee
Had spoiled his nice new rattle.

Just then flew down a monstrous crow,
As black as a tar-barrel!
Which frightened both the heroes so,
They quite forgot their quarrel.'

'I know what you're thinking about,' said Tweedledum; 'but it isn't so, nohow.'

'Contrariwise,' continued Tweedledee, 'if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic.'

'I was thinking,' Alice said politely, 'which is the best way out of this wood: it's getting so dark. Would you tell me, please?'

But the fat little men only looked at each other and grinned.

Newsflash: All Human Misery Now Hath Endeth

Pink News - They don't kill gays, but good for you.
Gay Star News - it worked! A miracle.

Well, that told 'em!

It's Christmas: Hint!

Money, money, money... etc etc.

Hell: O!

The Sun.

Why did no-one tell me about this hotty? I'd've bought a tellybox.

TV Review: The Lost Honour Of Christopher Jefferies

Can I be arsed to list all the newspapers who CJ sued for libel who are now saying this was a wonderful programme of great import?

PS No.

Wonderfully queeny portrayal by Jason Watkins. Very Dick Emery. Bafta?

Wednesday, 10 December 2014

Elgin Marbles: To Russia With Love

From the new Private Eye - a cracking issue.

PS The lovely Neil MacGregor on taking an Elgin Marble to St Petersburg as cultural diplomacy.

Taking this homoerotic rock cock to Russia does far more than standing outside their London embassy going 'BOO!'

ISIS: This Is Wrong!

Good to hear the Mail cares about gay men so much.

Fuck the caliphate, anyone for hegemony?

PS Fagburn is assuming this happened as described, though such horror stories have a habit of turning out to be made-up.

Egypt: If

Brian Whitaker in The Guardian.

Brian is The Guardian's former Middle East correspondent, and author of Unspeakable Love: Gay and lesbian life in the Middle East.

His blog makes a refreshing change from the usual ill-informed twaddle spoken about this subject.

PS Read also Scott Long's Cairo-based reporting of this disgusting media-frenzy farce on, A Paper Bird.

TfL: FfS!

As thousands cheered...


Civil Partnerships: Til Death Do Us Part

Excellent choice of photo by The Independent.

It shows (former) soldier boy, James Whartonm getting gaymarried, mere months before he ditched his 'husband'.

Calloo callay!

Update: Photo then replaced - as if by magic - with... some cake toppers!

Civil Partnerships: Upgrade

Today you can upgrade your civil partnership to a full-blown gaymarriage.

This is the first cringey insufferably posh couple to do so at Brighton Town Hall.

Words fucking fail me.

CIA: Torture

Says something that even the Mail's appalled.

Anal rape? Yes please!

From the newly declassified document via Wikileaks.

Now, if only there was some plucky young whistle-blower who could have leaked this earlier, so AmeriKKKa could put her in jail...

One of the worst myths official Washington and its establishment media have told itself about the torture debate is that the controversy is limited to three cases of waterboarding at Guantánamo and a handful of bad Republican actors. In fact, a wide array of torture techniques were approved at the highest levels of the U.S. Government and then systematically employed in lawless US prisons around the world – at Bagram (including during the Obama presidency), CIA black sites, even to US citizens on US soil. So systematic was the torture regime that a 2008 Senate report concluded that the criminal abuses at Abu Ghraib were the direct result of the torture mentality imposed by official Washington.

American torture was not confined to a handful of aberrational cases or techniques, nor was it the work of rogue CIA agents. It was an officially sanctioned, worldwide regime of torture that had the acquiescence, if not explicit approval, of the top members of both political parties in Congress. It was motivated by far more than interrogation. The evidence for all of this is conclusive and overwhelming. And the American media bears much of the blame, as they refused for years even to use the word “torture” to describe any of this (even as theycalled these same techniques “torture” when used by American adversaries), a shameful and cowardly abdication that continues literally to this day in many of the most influential outlets.

Glenn Greenwald, The Intercept.

Peter Brookes for The Times.